Day 3 of 30

Day 3 of 30 random things!

Describe your relationship with your parents.

My relationships with my parents are complicated.  And they are totally separate from each other.  My parents gave me a lot of freedom and not much discipline as a kid.  Thankfully, I was a really good kid, because sometimes I think about how disastrous it could have been otherwise.  Maybe my parents knew that and that’s why there was so little structure.  My parents went through a messy, complicated divorce when I was growing up, so understandably, they had a lot going on.  I don’t blame them or feel angry about my lack of structure.
My mom and I talk about everything.  Seriously, everything.  If you’ve told me a secret in my life, my mom probably knows it.  Our relationship gets complicated because of my mom’s struggles with addiction, but she’s my mom, and I love her, and she does the best she can.  And I do the best I can.  But I love that I grew up with a mom who made all of our Halloween costumes (and they were AWESOME) and came to all of our performances, and who lets me know how much she loves me on a daily basis.  And I’m glad that I now have a mom I can be friends with.
My dad traveled a lot for work when I was little, but I do remember always being excited when he got home, because he’d come back from Japan (or wherever he was, but it was usually Japan) and would bring me a stuffed penguin (which was what I collected).  Both of my parents were in an unhappy marriage, and I think my dad preferred all the business travel he did as an escape, and I definitely don’t blame him.  But it would have been nice to have him around more.  I don’t know that my dad really had any clue what to do with my sister and me when we were teenagers.  Teenage girls are complicated.  I think my dad was glad when I was old enough for us to have more of a friend relationship.  I think I spent a lot of time trying to do things to make my dad proud of me.  As an adult, I realize that can’t be my motivation for doing things.  I have to do things to make myself proud, and as long as I’m happy and healthy and successful in what I do, he’ll be happy, too.